Letters to Grayson: Pregnancy and Birth

Dear Grayson,

You were born on the 22nd of July but you were not expected until the middle of August, you came a little early but not as early as we expected you to. My pregnancy with you was eventful to say the least. Early on there was bleeding and for weeks we were not sure if you were developing. Then we had to switch doctors and chose someone out of state because we felt more comfortable. Thankfully this decision had the best possible outcome. We had a wonderful doctor who fought for you and for us. I had weekly ultrasounds to insure that you were growing and that you were safe. It was an incredible experience being able to watch you grow and despite the circumstances I feel grateful for being able to see you so often, it made the hard days so much easier. When I was 18 weeks in to my pregnancy with you we knew that we would lose you if something was not done. Four days later I had surgery, there were some minor issues in the operating room but luckily everything went smoothly. Before surgery my body was having issues supporting your weight, after I had to modify my activities but we knew that there was a much better chance of at least making it to 29. If we made it that far we knew that the doctors would fight to keep you alive so I counted down the days and weeks. During this time I made lots of decorations for your bedroom. Keeping busy planning for our life with you was so much easier than sitting around wondering how life would be if you didn't make it. There were still days when I worried and cried. I did not know what to expect or how your life would be if you were born early. It was one of the most difficult times in my life. Thankfully labor was not as difficult. I had contractions the entire week before you were born. We were at the hospital four times and had even been admitted to labor and delivery. I look back and I am so thankful that we had that extra week even if it was hectic and scary. We went to the hospital on July 21 after I woke your dad up from a nap, we had not been sleeping much between all the excitement during the week so we were both tired and unsure if you were actually coming or not. The doctor performed a test to see if your amniotic sac had ruptured but he could not be sure. After everything we had been through to keep you safe he felt it was best for you to be born. Seven hours after we got to the hospital you were in our arms. I wanted to have a natural delivery and I knew I could get through the pain, we had been through so much already. I did not want more medicine and more interference. After everything I wanted labor to be a calm natural experience. The first three hours went smoothly and then the rest of your amniotic sac was ruptured and for some reason my body reacted very badly. With every contraction I became more and more nauseous. Your daddy has a weak stomach when it comes to that kind of thing but luckily I had an amazing nurse that held me in her arms as I got sicker and sicker. The doctor tried several different medicines but nothing would work. My body was tensing up as I got sick and I couldn't physically push to deliver you. So after much debate I received an epidural and almost immediately I stopped getting sick. I was able to deliver you after two hours of pushing. You came out quiet with a swollen head that was covered in black curly hair. At first I worried at how quiet you were but luckily for us you were just calm. You opened your eyes right away and I could not get over how tiny you seemed. You weighed 6 lbs and 14 ounces and you were 22 inches long. It was 2:44 in the morning and despite the time your Grandpa Gary and your Aunt Netta were at the hospital to help welcome you in to the world. Your Daddy cried as he held you for the first time and we finally agreed that your name would be Grayson. Daddy wanted to name you after Grandpa Gary and picked Keith for your middle name. You would not believe how hard it was for us to agree on your name but in the end we love it and I can not imagine you with any other name. You are a sweet, calm and smiley baby. You sleep great and we are grateful each and every day for the many people who helped to bring you safely in to this world. You are our greatest joy.

Love Always, Momma